I'd Like to Talk to You about Cheeses

(yeah, I got a good night's sleep last night)

For most of history the biggest concern humans have had when it comes to food has been how to get enough of it. The idea of standing in front of an open refrigerator filled with leftovers and saying, "There's nothing to eat" would strike most of humanity as unfathomable.

Obviously, considering the history of the human race, I am of superior stock. I could outlast most of you in a famine, make soup out of your carcasses, and survive until the rains come. Until that happy day arrives, however, all of my superiority manifests itself as FAT.

I just got back from a Bible conference with the theme of I Peter which contains the following admonition to women: "Do not let your adorning be external -- the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear -- but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious."

I know that Christians are not to be vain, are not to judge by appearances, all the rest of that. I mean, even Beauty and the Beast teaches that moral. But at the same time I don't believe it's wrong to try to do a little primping here and there (remember Esther!) -- and even more, I know it's right to try to keep our bodies strong and healthy so that we might be able to do God's work for as long as possible.

Don't get me wrong -- as long as we can breathe we can glorify him. But I want to be in the trenches (or at least working back at the base camp!) for as long as I can.

So I'm going to the gym. And I'm trying to make "Good Choices." I hate that -- don't you hate that? "Good Choices." I'd like to take Good Choices out back and slap him around a little bit. Good Choices is a buzz kill, the death of the party, the nerd who gets pantsed by the jocks after school. But later, of course, the nerd starts the tech company in Silicon Valley, sells out for a cool billion, and the jock is selling sprinkler systems in Wetumpka.

Basically, I don't want to be a burden. I mean, this is not a news flash -- no one wants to be a burden. I want to live until I die. Statistics show that most of us will endure a period of impairment before we kick off; the goal is to make that period as short as possible. I know (we all know) people who suffer for years, increasingly disabled, undergoing more and more treatments, procedures, pain, incapacity...

All you have to do, to be honest, is go sit in a Walmart for an afternoon. You will come out of there motivated to train for a triathlon, Store-provided scooters, folks pulling their e-cylinders (although I've never smoked, so I'm probably pretty good on that score).

But here's a question. Say I get hit by a bus tomorrow. Will I be fat or thin in heaven? Because while I can appreciate that in heaven everyone is beautiful no matter their physical appearance, it's still easier to move around if you're thin than if you're fat and who wants to be fat for all eternity? But if i'm thin in heaven will people know who I am? Oh, the mysteries of the hereafter.

Thirty sweat-inducing minutes on the elliptical and 10,000 steps a day. Maybe I'll start weight training tomorrow. Remember the body-less heads on Futurama? That'd sure make things easier.

"I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship." --Romans 12:1

So I guess when God says he wants everything, all of us, top to bottom, he wants all of us. Does he care if I choose the Twinkie instead of he apple? Seems likely. Can I offer exercise and healthy eating as an act of worship? According to I Corinthians 10:31 the answer is a resounding "yes." This is not an extra fat-and-sugar-filled layer of guilt to be slapped on top of all the other layers that we already have: it is for freedom that Christ has made us free. And he loves us. And he made good things for us to enjoy. And he wants us to delight in his gifts. Just along with the delighting maybe I can work in a few more steps and a core workout.